On Superlative Places to Sleep

The sound of the shutter woke me up.

What’s that, you say? A fuzzy bathroom rug, you say? One that traps cat hair?

WELL CONSIDER ME TRAPPED.

This is the very best thing to sleep on. Except for the couch.

And the dining room table.

And the coffee table.

And the office chairs.

Also the bed, when the girl isn’t careful and I sneak into the bedroom like a ninja. A really beautiful ninja. The most beautiful ninja. It’s like a ninja and all cat beauty queens ever had a perfect baby, and that baby was me.

‘Scuse me, time to sleep like a punctuation mark on the bathroom rug.

I can't decide if I'm doing the punctuation mark or the square bracket....

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